a reminder to self: to be here
A few days ago I moved my “work day” to my parents’ patio - cup of coffee, laptop, phone - with a long list of to do’s. Headphones in, binaural beats on and go.
After about twenty minutes I looked up and saw the neighbor’s father, who is in his nineties and currently dealing with Dementia, staring at me in disbelief, almost alarmed. I took my headphones out and said hello then realized what he was seeing.
I no doubt, on this particular day, was working frantically, switching from my phone to my computer to doing God knows what, while he sat in a porch swing angled out at a beautiful view of trees and green and blue skies.
Whether he was seeing what I was projecting or not, I saw a girl, or a woman rather, who was paying no attention to her surroundings, to what was actually occurring.
Leaves in the wind.
The smell of fresh cut grass.
Inhales.
Exhales.
Presence.
No, I wasn’t paying attention to that. Instead I was “running” in circles, like a caged animal, with a bunch of screens. Trying to get to the end of a list and am inbox that would never been empty, never be done.
This photo was taken yesterday. A day on the creek with friends, an entire weekend spent outside. And I came back here just an hour ago for more of this and then to write these words.
A reminder to Self.
To be here.
